*Readers' discretion advised*
Last time on the "Silver and Black Shitshow," the Raiders scored yet another upset victory in Oakland against the Black and Gold Brigade (UrinatingTree, 2018). The loss was so embarrassing, that the Raiders earned a special appearance on the #1 sports soap opera webseries "Days of Our Steelers." For one day, the Silver and Black weren't a shitshow as Derek Carr and the Tank Commander lead the team to their biggest win this season.
But the jubilation wasn't meant to last. The following day, the Raiders have fired the Fat Freckle Face after 7 years as the GM of the Raiders. Let's make one thing clear, we need to take out the first two years of the Reggie McKenzie era. Prior to his arrival, the Raiders were financially strapped and they didn't even draft until Round 3 in 2012. They were stuck with the salaries of a washed up Richard Seymour and a disgruntled Carson Palmer that the Hue-Man (Hue Jackson) foolishly mortgaged the future for just to acquire him. The 2013 draft class, outside of Le'Veon Bell, is considered as one of the worst draft classes of all time. It wasn't until the 2014 Draft where Reggie finally righted the ship. Reggie had a 5-year plan enacted to restore the Raiders back to contention. He did so in 2016. 2017 was significant down year marred by injuries and division in the locker room due to the anthem protests. And now 2018, the team that Reggie worked to achieve in a 4-5 year span was destroyed in an instant, courtesy of Madman Gruden. (Honestly, how many nicknames have I given him already?) This season, Reggie was not the GM. He was nothing more of a puppet, a "yes man", a punching bag, and a scapegoat to the epic fail moves the Chuckster executed behind-the-scenes. His firing was imminent. The Chuckster had assumed direct control of the team since the day he returned from the booth.
The Shitshow raged on. In a season full of lies, deception, and false hope, a city bounded its community together and rose up to the occasion that it is tired of being the epicenter of the Shitshow. That would be the City of Oakland. After a long period of staying silent, the City of Oakland finally filed the lawsuit against Mark Davis, the Raiders, and the NFL for damages in the relocation to Vegas. Let's not forget that Oakland is still paying off the bonds for the construction of Mt. Davis in the Coliseum in 1995. They need every penny to squeeze out of the Raiders to pay that off if the team is going to leave them in dust. An added bonus, the City could retain the Raider name and colors in and keep it in Oakland. Let's get facts here, Oakland came up with the "Raiders" name during the franchise's inception.
In another sense, the lawsuit indicates that the Raiders have played their last season in Oakland. Effective, Christmas Eve against the Denver Broncos on Monday Night Football could be the last time the Raiders play in the Oakland Coliseum. Mark Davis and the Raiders have rescinded their lease extension proposal until 2020 when the Las Vegas stadium is complete in response to Oakland's lawsuit. Yes, after this season, they're essentially homeless. So homeless, yet so wretched that I won't even sing "Paradise" by Phil Collins to them. The Raiders do have options to remain in the Golden State for at least one more year before they move to the Silver State: Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego, Levi's Stadium in my home town of Santa Clara, AT&T Park in San Francisco, and even Bulldog Stadium in Fresno. Oh if they ever choose Levi's Stadium or AT&T Park, it would be the biggest definition of hypocrisy from the Raiders and Mark Davis.
The rest of Raider Nation still has to open their eyes and recognize the real problem: Mark Davis is writing checks that his ass can't cash. If we look at his net worth compared to other NFL owners, he is a little fish in the big ocean swimming with the sharks. He blew $100 million for Jon Gruden. He's borrowing a big loan from BofA that is bigger than his net worth of $500 million to finance the Las Vegas stadium. We get more insight from Amari Cooper (yes, I know you guys are tired of him), insisting that Mark Davis was the one who wanted him traded. We all know Mark is a sensitive piece of shit, so when someone or something gets in his feelings, he acts irrationally. Does firing the timeless Raiders radio play-by-play announcer Greg Papa because of his criticism of Mark wanting to bring Mike Shanahan back at the expense of a deceased Al Davis ring any bells? Now that we hear a little bit more from Coop, that adds more firewood to the flame. If we can just get some more testimonials from Khalil Mack, Reggie McKenzie, and Jack Del Rio, Mark Davis is on the verge of being exposed as the snake that he is. The lawsuit from Oakland is a must-buy for Pay Per View as Mark Davis is about to get cornered like the scowl, broke owner he is. Oh and even if he successfully goes to Vegas, he still has to deal with a pissed off Las Vegas casino mogul in Sheldon Adelson. All I can say to Marky Mark is "keep your friends close and your enemies closer."
So much drama has unfolded over the last few days since the Raiders pulled out the victory against the Steelers. The one thing that could remedy this is another win. And the Raiders have no better opportunity against the Cincinnati Bungles. The Bengals have to play the rest of the season without the Andy Dalton-A.J. Green connection. Marvin Lewis somehow still has the head-coaching job with Cincinnati. Oh, and look who it is? Hue-Man, Hue Jackson. This should be easy picking. Hue has brought nothing but bad juju since returned to Cincinnati after being let go by the Browns. Long overdue, now the Browns can win games.
They couldn't seize the opportunity that presented itself. The Shitshow found themselves in a 0-17 hole early. Derek Carr, to no surprise, kept getting sacked behind a patchwork O-line and rookie tackles that couldn't hold up penetration if their life depended on it. Let's make some things clear, Kolton Miller sucked major ass being a blindside protector. Brandon Parker is the 2nd coming of Khalif Barnes with all these false start penalties he committed this game. It also doesn't help that Kelechi Osemele and Gabe Jackson are injured, so they had to be replaced by two nobodies whose names that even die hard Raider fans don't give an absolute shit about. Oh yeah and turnovers. Jalen Richard reminded all of us of his fumblerooskie ways dating back to his sophomore campaign last year. There was a reason why he was on the roster bubble this season. The strip-sack on Carr was all she wrote as the Bengals scored early and never looked back.
However, the Raiders did keep themselves within striking distance behind the big leg of Daniel Carlson, trailing by 10 points or a touchdown. Derek Carr kept the offense churning as much as he could. Long without Amari Cooper or Michael Crabtree, long without the Great Wall of Oakland that was destroyed courtesy of the Cable Guy, Carr kept the wheels of the patchwork offense moving like it was 2014 all over again. What a difference four years make. Unfortunately, the Bengals went for the knockout punch late in the 4th quarter, behind a haymaker from Smokin' Joe Mixon. While Jeff Driskel did make plays as he had competent receivers like John Ross and Tyler Boyd, it was Joe Mixon who carried the Bungles' dead carcass to victory.
Back to the Shitshow indeed after this loss. They say football is a funny game sometimes. The Raiders had a big win last week. The following week, they lose to the Bungles. I've lost count how many times Derek Carr has been sacked this season. Truly, he is dying for the Tank Commander's sins. Derek is literally his brother David Carr his first two seasons with the Texans. Promising quarterback, but had a shitty O-line around him that ended up scarring him for his first two seasons. Derek is lucky that he is still relevant than his brother was in their first five seasons. Speaking of O-line, it could get worse as Gabe Jackson is lost for the season. Barring a return from Kelechi Osemele, that leaves Rodney Hudson as the only competent O-linemen remaining. The Great Wall of Oakland has been torn asunder. The same can be said about the Coliseum as the Raiders could play their final game there against the Donkeys on Monday Night Football. Cleveland '95 part two could be brewing regardless of the outcome.
The final results of the Khalil Mack trade are in! The Bears clinch the NFC North and Mack has made the Pro Bowl yet again. As for the Raiders? No Pro Bowlers were selected, only alternates as Jared Cook, Hudson, and K.O. were selected and they're tanking. Perhaps, this should serve as a valuable lesson in life: YOU DO NOT TRADE YOUR ONCE IN A GENERATIONAL PLAYER FOR 50/50 DRAFT PICKS! Thus far, the Tank Commander had no significant moves to respond to one of the dumbest trades ever executed in Pro Football. Not even one addition. Let's see the latest move he made:
Nathan Peterman? The Nathan Peterman? The man, the myth, the living meme? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..........
No comments:
Post a Comment