Good evening Raider Nation and welcome to a special Smack Talk post in which my friend, Stillmattic and I, we engaged in a war of words here. Keep in mind, we've had this conversation beforehand and I transcribed all this in a Word document. Considering the length of the conversation this will be split into two parts. I'll say the first part here, we started with some fireworks, then the conversation escalated into a weird @$$ direction thanks to Stillmattic bringing up references to other interests we have in common. Anyway, I'll leave out a key here to denote which one of us is talking and enjoy this entertaining bantering.
KEY:
MG = MechG
SMT = Stillmattic
*WARNING: EXPLICIT LANGUAGE VIEWER'S DISCRETION ADVISED*
SMT: FUCK YO RAIDAHS! #GOLDBLOODED
MG: #RNFL FUCK THE FORTY WHINERS!
SMT: Gold outshines Silver boi. You know nothing about the worth of that shiny shine shine.
Yeeeeeeeee
MG: Whatever. Alright guys welcome in to a special smack talk post for the 49ers - Raiders game Let me first welcome in to the True Raider Laker, the T.R.L. Stillmattic of Bleach Zealot.
SMT: WHOOO! And this weekend it's the Battle of the Bay and a storm's coming ladies and gentlemen. It's been years since the two duked it out.
MG: Yeah, I told you he writes the best intros. Lol. Anyway Stillmattic and I go way back. We've had a couple of collaborations on his blog, currently were on our third one. But here is our fourth, only this time I have the home field. Lol.
SMT: Home field advantage or not, we are here to prep up for the upcoming game. Bantering before the game only showcases our incredibly desire to see the game in action. So without further ado, I think Khan from Star Trek said it best, "Shall we begin?"
MG: But first, tell the Raider Nation about yourself. Don't worry, they are not going to completely trash you. Maybe in a second but you get the point. So Stillmateezy how did you become a Niner fan?
SMT: I became a Niner Fan when my family started taking an interest in the team whenever they were in the playoffs. It was an exciting & frustrating time because we never made it to the Super Bowl and it was always some team like the Saints orr Seahawks that managed to win the title in the end. Prior to taking an interest in Football for that matter, I supported my cousins's love for the Denver Broncos. I just recently last year began taking an interest in football so as to create an identity for myself much like my fondness for the Golden State Warriors in Basketball.
MG: See I told you guys, the guy used to be a Donkey fan until we dropped a fifty burger on them in their own stadium!
SMT: HEY! I resent that notion. Though my cousin still adores the Broncos, I'm now and forever will always be rocking the gold blooded. Peyton Manning or not, my heart shines for the red & gold. Kaepernick needs to step his game up and not sock ya hear. That last game was a disappointment and Sherman once again getting a little too cocky. I believe the 49ers may have a chance if we follow 3 words: DON'T FUCK UP!
MG: Kaepernick? More like Krapperdick. But no worries yeah that was a Thanksgiving day every Niner fan wants to forget about. Hey look on the bright side, my Raiders just got shut out 52-0 against the Rams
SMT: My mind is scarred still ladies and gentlemen. It was such a lovely Thanksgiving dinner until the Fire Nation (49ers) got their @$$e% handed to them by the Water Tribe (Seahawks).
MG: See guys the thing about Stillmattic is that he hasn't suffered that much as I did.
SMT: But I believe we can beat a team that lost to the Rams. Literally, they got Rammed in the Arses 52-0. I have yet to suffer as MechG said, but I'll soon be on my way.
MG: Dude, you have 7 wins and still in the playoff hunt. We just only got 1 win and playing for a top 5 pick in the draft!
SMT: 7's a lucky #. All you guys did was take a piss. You're getting crapped on and f*ed on all sides. Face it ~ the epic showdown we're seeing this weekend comes down you guys taking a #2 or us winning 8 games, which in the Bible means "A New Beginning." A new beginning for us means there's hope yet. Jim, I gotta tell ya, we need you more than ever ya sexy bastard you. Oh btw, this here poster signifies the epicness of this week's game:
MG: Yes that is epic. But you want to know a secret about Jim that will possibly scar you for life?
SMT: What's that?
MG: He got his first coaching gig from the Raiders.
SMT: He realized then that Silver doesn't shine as bright as the 49ers and hence why he's aiming for GOLD
MG: Nah man there's a reason why he wears black all the time. Look at his cap, look at his long sleeve all black. He has the look, the attitude of a RAIDER! It's too bad he's on a Niner team that has Squidward as a Quarterback and an ass of an offensive coordinator. #JimHarbaughtoOakland
SMT: The 49ers love Jim. Jim stay because you can turn the team around so that we don't suck dick like what happened in the last game. Be smart with the plays and follow through. Kae has to not worry about getting pummeled. Ji may have the attitude of a Raider, but his heart belongs now to the 49ers. #Jimisthemanwiththeplan
MG: Your owner and GM is saying otherwise. Kaepernick is not a QB. We have what the Niners do not have and that's the QB of the future. And that QB is DEREK CARR! It's too bad he's surrounded with a SHITTY SUPPORTING CAST AND A SHITTY COACHING STAFF!
SMT: Derek Carr, more like Derek Hardy Har Har. And you want to know something coincidental MechG?
MG: What? Or enlighten us.
SMT: My gurl right here is rocking the 49ers Red, Black, & Gold. We mustn't lose our way! #Ryuko49er
MG: How come you guys keep losing your way to Seattle then? Huh? HUH?
SMT: Sometimes a winding road is difficult to cross. It's a sign that we need to focus more on the road rather than getting lose in it. Pitt said it best ~
MG: Lol...
SMT: This is going to be a Battle of the Bay played out in bantering & Memes! If that's how you wanna play ya Gayder, then it's on like Donkey Kong!
MG: Hey you may have Ryuko riding the Blood and Piss oops I mean Red and Gold. But I got Lightning repping the Silver and Black!
SMT: Then why she always so emotionless? It's like you guys are trying to fuck up. Lol yet she sports some gold....a traitor perhaps?
MG: Before I resume, if you guys don't what Stillmattic and I are doing. Go to Bleach Zealot and look through all the Fight Night archives or check my YouTube channel youtube.com/mechg2994 for the references.
MG: Hey I see a little orange in Ryuko. Those are not Whiner colors. Those are Donkey colors. And I hate em either way.
SMT: Ryuko's scissor blades will cut through all black & silver.
MG: Ok, ok I think we're plugging something unrelated just a little too much. It's good to draw in some Anime and Video Game fans who are Niner and Raider fans, but let's get back on topic.
SMT: Hey, Chelsea's on our side too. She rocking the red & black. She got a heart of Gold behind her mischief And Akame as well. But.....I digress.
MG: Ok, lol. First Kill la Kill, then Final Fantasy, now Akame ga Kill, I don't even know where this is even going.
*Part 2 posted below*
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